You know the feeling. You just can’t seem to switch your brain off. No matter what you do. It’s think, think, think, think all day long. And more often than not it’s not very helpful thinking. I mean it’s not like we’re thinking of our last holiday or anything else that would generate good feelings. It’s usually worry or wondering how we’re going to fit everything in or planning or just going over the same ole crap.

Why does this happen?

Science geek to the rescue!

Yes everything that I’m going to tell you is straight from neuroscience. They can tell us lots about how our brain works and what the hell to do with it so it’s not out of control.

First of all our brains have 3 negative thoughts to every positive thought. That sucks doesn’t it!

So before we even start we’re behind the eight ball. You might think that’s a bit of a design flaw. Wouldn’t you think our creator would have wanted us to be happier than that? I guess I can forgive whoever it was that created us for putting safety and survival above happiness. Cos all that negative thinking is all related to survival. But I’ll leave off explaining how that works for another time.

The good news is that thoughts only last 20 seconds. I was gonna say that’s not very long really. But if you think about it – what that means is that you have a full minute of negative thoughts for every 20 seconds of positive thoughts. That has to change.

Anyway, as I was saying before I side-tracked myself, the good news is that thoughts only last 20 seconds. And the even better news is that if you don’t jump on the negative thoughts, if you don’t pay them attention, they go away. And not only do they go away but your brain starts to reorganise itself into a happier little camper.

When we had to pay attention to all the dangerous stuff out there (in cave man days) of course it was a good idea to keep focused on some of the scary, worrying things. But back then they came and went. Now they never stop. So cave men and women could afford to focus on negative stuff cos it was only a matter of time til the next lull in their lives. For us, we need to do everything we can to keep positive because there’s negative and worry around us everywhere.

The trick is: don’t try to switch to positive thoughts. There’s something about the not doing anything that makes the brain reorganise itself.

There’s also a little flaw with positive thinking on purpose. If you don’t believe what you’re positively thinking your amygdala will know and it will still be activating your fear response. Now anyone can see that that’s just not good. Or positive. And then you’ll learn to associate fear with whatever you were thinking positively about.

So the trick is to disengage from the negative thoughts. Yes they’re there. Yes they’re yukky. But yes they will also disappear and create more space for positivity if you just leave them alone. So instead of elaborating on those negative thoughts watch them pass. Just a thought

If you want to know more about how to disengage from negative thoughts email for more details on how I can help you.

michelle@healgrowtransform.com.au

Have you ever wondered why you seem to get to a certain level of success. Or a certain level of happiness. Or even find yourself the partner of your dreams. And instead of enjoying it and making the most of it  –  you self-sabotage?

Why do we do that?

Actually why do I do that?

The miracle of science has helped us to actually see what’s going on when this happens. Thankyou science – being a geek pays off after all.

So…. it all starts with a story.

Once upon a time there was a little brain. This little brain absorbed as much as it could from everyone and everything around it. Every comment it heard (“you’ll never amount to anything” “money is the root of all evil” “success comes with hard work and perseverance”) got absorbed into that little brain. And it started to form a picture of itself and the world.

These pictures were like some kind of magical spell. Everywhere it went and everything it did – this little brain was influenced by these pictures even if it couldn’t see that the pictures were there. It would get a job and work long and hard every day so that it missed out on a lot of
family time and other things that made it happy (“success comes with hard work”).

Whenever success was just around the corner it would find a way to screw up or drop out and not take that last step to success (“you’ll
never amount to anything”).

Basically it would keep sabotaging itself so that the picture it had formed of itself and the world didn’t have to change.

Because with change comes FEAR.

Awwww. What a sad story.

But it’s not a story that has to have a sad ending.

There is actually an area of our brains that stores our self-image and belief system about the world around us. When we start to become more successful or play bigger that self-image gets challenged. “Oooh that’s not me it says. I’m not that successful. There’s something wrong with the picture of me as successful. I have to change it back to what feels comfortable.”

The amygdala gets in on the game too. “Change!” it says “That’s ever so scary. I’m rallying my troops and sending out all the fear messengers.”

So we get anxious and afraid. We sabotage. We do anything that reduces the fear and keeps our self-image exactly where it is – “I’ll never amount to anything.” Not very helpful but very comfortable.

To change that ending we can do a few little things.

We can break things down way, way smaller. That way we sneak past the amygdala. So instead of going gung ho at the “I’m going to be a millionaire” dream, we sneak up on it. Step by step. Small goal by small goal.

We can start to form a different picture of ourselves. We can use visualisation. Or imagining ourselves as the successful, happy, love-deserving person we want  to be. The more we mentally rehearse this the more our self-image changes and the less dissonance (fancy word for conflict) we feel between our desired self and our perceived self. When there’s no dissonance our amygdala doesn’t get worried and make us scared.

We can try some tricky subconscious altering things. These self-images are stored in the subconscious so if you do stuff to get the subconscious on side we can change a whole lot easier.

Or we can try to make all these aspects of our self-image conscious through therapy to give us a chance to know which radars we need to fly under.

So if you want to know more about how to stop self-sabotaging every time you reach a certain level of success, email me:

michelle@healgrowtransform.com.au

I like to think of us more sensitive, creative types as Right-Brainers.

We process things emotionally rather than rationally and we go by our gut instincts. So we tend to feeeel a lot.

We take in loads of information from what’s around us which can spark lots of amazing ideas. But we can also tend to overthink things and
we can get overwhelmed quickly if there’s too much going on.

We process things very deeply so we have a rich, complex inner life. Jeez – my inner world is like a 3D movie spectacular! This is awesome for self-reflection and getting to know yourself but it can lead to being more anxious and maybe even more prone to bouts of depression.

And on a more practical level – having too much to do in a short period of time can really rattle us. And that is stressful.

So as a Right-Brainer we need more specific ways to manage stress. But of course these work for Left-Brainers too.

Time out.
As a Right-Brainer one of the most important things for us to do is have time out. We need more quiet time for a few reasons.

First of all we need time to allow all the information we take in to be processed and filed away in our brains. Our brains heat up when we’re doing lots of thinking and processing. Time out gives our brain a chance to cool down. Too much heat makes us feel like we’ve blown a gasket.
Or that we’re about to. Exploding brains is a pretty cool party trick but it’s a once only trick.

Another reason we need time out is that we’re so sensitive to what’s around us – noise, lights, images, other people’s emotions. We take in so much that we get ‘full’ quickly. You know that “I’m up to here” feeling? All we need is some ‘empty’ time to feel normal again.

Time out is also great if we’re a creative Right-Brainer. Creativity thrives when we have space and time and peace. Even if you don’t consider yourself creative (and I bet you are) having time out will spark more creative solutions to problems, more creative ways of getting things done, and more creative ways to have fun.

Get really good with boundaries. Boundaries let other people how to treat us. They tell us where we end and another person begins. They do a whole heap of other stuff too but these are the main things for now.

As a Right-Brainer we pick up on other people’s emotions a lot. In fact we could almost be the human sponge. The super-absorbent variety. Boundaries help us work out what’s their emotion (spillage that doesn’t need to be soaked up) and what’s ours (sponge away). Without boundaries we can feel like basket-cases on an emotional roller-coaster ride.  Or we can feel like water-logged with everyone else’s stuff. Either way – it’s much less stressful to have good boundaries in place. Learning to be assertive helps with this too.

Boundaries also help us realise when enough is enough. Boundaries will tell us way before we reach overload that we’re reaching overload so we can stop and recharge.

Don’t overthink it. Let’s face it – there’s a point where self-reflection stops being self-reflection and slams slap bang into overthinking. No matter how you look at it overthinking is just not helpful. It creates soooooo much stress.

Sometimes it can be a matter of reminding ourselves that thinking something to death isn’t the solution. Sometimes it might need a bit of  distraction. And sometimes it might need a good firm talking to. Our minds forget who’s in charge sometimes. You have to keep reminding them who’s boss and tell them to stop stressing us out.

So that was the tip of the iecberg on how to Manage Stress as a Right-Brainer. Leave comments below if you have any tips for fellow Right-Brainers on how to manage stress. Or contact me for more.

Before you read this make sure you read Perfectionism: Part 1. It has all sorts of useful stuff on the difference between Standard and Neurotic Perfectionism. And some other stuff about Perfection Paralysis.

But today I’m going to tell you more about Perfection Paralysis.

When you live with the lovely Neurotic Perfectionism nothing is ever good enough and you feel like if “it’s” not good enough then neither are you.

If you don’t get it right first time then you’re a failure at it.

If you fail at something then you’re a failure.

‘Good enough’ is never good enough.

Jeez this sounds like hard work! And, speaking from experience, it is.

So rather than facing the probability of feeling like a failure, it can sometimes be easier not to try at all.

And if you have a project on the go that could be evaluated when it’s finished and show you up as less than the perfect you’re striving for then why finish it? Why not procrastinate and throw rocks in your path and sabotage every effort to complete it? Then you’re off the hook. You can’t be ‘not good enough’ if it’s never finished.

BUT…..for those living with Neurotic Perfectionism not finishing also makes you not good enough, less than perfect and probably pretty close to being a failure.

See. I told you it was hard work.

There’s a pretty simple solution:

Lower your expectations.

Yes it is that simple.

But a true perfectionist will balk at the idea of this. “Are you crazy?” they will say. “Lower my expectations? Impossible!”

But the crazy thing is…NOT lowering them means NOTHING gets done. Or it’s absolute torture getting anything done.  And even then it’s not good enough.

So why not start with lowering expectations? Just give it an itty bitty try.

Matisse (famous artist) did hundreds of ‘crappy first draft’ drawings before he created one masterpiece. Obviously you gotta mess around bit before you ‘get it right’.

And how’s this little fact: Did you know that a large percentage of millionaire entrepreneurs have been bankrupt? I’m sure a Perfectionist would consider bankruptcy a failure. These millionaires obviously didn’t though. They just kept on trying and not beating themselves about not being perfect. And voila…. they made it to the top again. Probably with one ‘crappy first step’ after another.

I’ve had to lower the expectations I have of myself getting my new website done. It doesn’t have to be perfect first time around. Hey…..it doesn’t have to be perfect at all!

I had to lower my expectations to get my PhD completed. No matter how many revisions I made, it was NOT going to be perfect. And if it was evaluated negatively then all it really meant was that my strengths don’t lie in being an academic. But I knew that anyway so what was the point in worrying about it?

So when you lower your expectations about perfection stuff gets done. When you lower your expectations of yourself (i.e. not having to be a master at everything) stuff gets done AND you don’t feel like a failure. Bonus!

So when you feel the pinch of Perfection Paralysis, lower the pressure, lower the expectations and be pleasantly surprised.

I had a call this morning with one of my beautiful clients – and yes – they’re all beautiful. Problem was – she’d developed Perfection Paralysis. Yep – a very technical term – you’ll find it in all the ……ok in none of the serious psychological texts – but it should be.

Perfection Paralysis stops us from starting things or finishing things – just in case they’re not perfect. And it definitely takes all the fun out of everything we do.

And if what we’re doing is no fun …… well then ……where’s the fun in that?

And seriously – stuff should be fun.

Before we go too far into Perfection Paralysis let’s get something clear about Perfectionism.

There are 2 types:

• Standard Perfectionism which is striving for the goal of flawlessness but with realistic expectations and realistic standards. That means that you try to achieve the best you can which boosts your self-esteem and makes you feel pride in yourself.
• Then there’s ‘Neurotic Perfectionism’ where you have incredibly high and unrealistic standards for yourself. Neurotic perfectionists tend to be motivated by fear – fear of failing, fear of disappointing others, fear of feeling shame and guilt for not being perfect.

So let’s just take a look at how this would work.

Person with Standard Perfectionism is learning an instrument. They practice regularly but never expect that they should be anything but a beginner at the beginning. They make a mistake and it’s all just a normal part of the process of learning. They keep practicing and slowly get better and better and better.

Person with Neurotic Perfectionism (not my title for it by the way – I would have used something that didn’t sound so yukky) is learning the same instrument. They practice with enthusiasm initially but then cos they expect they should be perfect and have unrealistic expectations of themselves as a beginner they quickly become discouraged. They make mistakes as all learners do but they tell themselves they’re hopeless at playing – they loll about in the shame for a while. They don’t want to practice anymore cos they’re not doing it well enough – more shame and disappointment. It becomes a chore and they stop. They tell themselves they’re no good at it and that they failed at learning.

But the only thing they failed at is being kind to themselves.

Perfectionists are really really hard task masters.

How do I know?

I used to be the poster child for Perfectionism.

And yes it would stop me starting stuff. And it would stop me finishing things. And it nearly made me give up on learning guitar and put up some serious barriers when I was looking at starting my business.

PPPhhhhlllggghhhh (insert raspberry blowing me) to you Perfectionism. You didn’t stop me.

But wait……. In the interests of staying interesting I’m going to give you some stuff to ponder this week and tell you more about Perfection Paralysis next week.

Things to ponder:

• What kind of perfectionist are you? (if you are at all)
• Are you a perfectionist in some areas but not others?
• Has there been anything you’ve wanted to start (like networking if you’re in business or starting that new creative project) but haven’t because you think you won’t be good enough?
• Has there been anything you haven’t finished (like a website if you’re wanting to start a business or a book you’re writing) cos you think the finished project won’t be good enough?

Let me know at my Facebook Page.

I’ve been doing a little experiment with myself. I’ve been approaching two very similar things in a left brain (analytical, structured) way and right brain (creative, visual) way. And I’ve been experimenting with what feeeeels better.

Guess what! Right brain every time. Big fat inner smiles and some humming and sometimes outright singing happening when doing things in a right brain way.

So it got me thinking………

If doing things in a creative way is more fun and brings a big fat inner smile to myself then surely creativity would be an awesome way to lift moods and increase happiness.

Well actually …… being the science geek that I am – I KNOW that creativity makes you happier so I must confess that I really wasn’t as smart as I made out. Jeez this honesty part of me gets in the way of a good story sometimes.

So … let’s face it. We are not ALWAYS happy. Me included.

Sometimes the world gets us down. Sometimes we have issues with other people. Sometimes we’re just downright cranky for no apparent reason.

So if you don’t want to go for the instant baggage dump on your friends or if you can’t wait to set an appointment with your therapist here are some creative things you can try:

Creative Remedy #1: Music. How often have you listened to sad songs when you’re feeling down? “Ahhh someone understands my heartbreak.” It’s good to know you’re not alone.

When you’ve had a bit of a wallow and maybe shed a tear or two try some uplifting music or something gentle and soothing.

Music soothes the savage remember! And it has scientifically validated effects on your mood. Ahhh – science geek rears her head again.

Creative Remedy #2: Journaling. Only a journal can truly listen unconditionally while you unburden yourself. And it will still love you even if you’ve snotted on it and smudged it’s ink. And it’s ever so patient. You could write in it for hours and it would still sit perfectly still for you.

If you wanna get really creative and totally change your mindset about your ‘stuff’ try re-writing your ‘stuff’ in a story where you’re a hero/heroine. Yes – you are allowed moments of tragedy and tears in your story but try for a happy ending.

Creative Remedy #3: Draw Stuff.

Try a bit of visual relief as well. Doodle some broken hearts or exploding brains (if you’ve had a run-in with someone) or you as a Pina Colada sipping goddess (guys- feel free to have a go at being a goddess or adjust to your personal taste).

Ok maybe drawing is not your forte (hey I spelt forte right 1^st time – thanks spellcheck). Maybe scribbling or colouring in is more up our alley. Get yourself a colouring book if you want to. The simple art of creating pretty pictures is very therapeutic. Ps. Cutting and pasting also works.

Drawing (and other picture creating activities) let’s your subconscious mind do the work for you. Rather than your rational brain (that I find often gets in the way of dealing with your problems) doing all the work, your subconscious comes up with answers and solutions for you.

Warning: they could be cryptic answers but they’ll be damn good. You’ll have to use your creativity to decipher them but being creative makes you happy right – so it should just make you happier anyway.

Creative Remedy #4: Dance. Yep – like no-one’s watching. And hopefully they’re not. I’m not just talking dancing to your favourite tune in a conservative, socially acceptable way. I’m talking interpretive dance, acting out your ‘in need of dumping’ situation.

Moving your body moves all the emotion around and out. Out is the important bit.

Warning! Doing this for hours every day could result in excessive expression of emotion e.g. crying at everything like “So You Think You Can Dance’ contestants.

So there you have it….. creativity as therapy.

Now that I’ve done myself out of a job……..

But of course you still need me. Don’t you?

How many people made New Year’s Resolutions?

How many have you already broken?

Is that what you do with them – break them?

I can see them now – all these little broken sentences lying in the corners of my house. The two L’s from “I wiLL…” sticking up like little dead letter legs.

I have to stop – it’s making me sad.

I have to confess that due to previous years’ failures this year I failed to make New Year’s Resolutions at all.

But….. I think I figured out what I was doing wrong.

When I was actually making New Year’s Resolutions I would make BIG ones. Hey – come on – it’s the start of a new year. BIG is the only way to Resolute.

(If I’m not making words up I’m making up ways to use them – maybe that was meant to be Resolve. Anyway, I don’t really care – I like Resolute the best. Can you believe they awarded me a PhD? No….. neither can I).

Back on track again……. so I start with a New Year’s Resolution like….. “I wiLL (watch out for those dead letter legs) do yoga every morning and eat really healthy and be nice ALL the time and and and…”

Can you see the problem with this?

For starters too many things. Yep – that was quite obvious. My advice…..pick one. If you can’t possibly pick only one try for 3 but DO NOT have any more. More = failure. (Love those formula’s).

Next….no-one is EVER going to be nice ALL the time. It’s humanly impossible. Scrap that one and anything remotely similar from your list.

Here’s some goodies:

Small steps with everything. Yoga EVERY morning. Crazy. Not going to happen. What if your cat develops an allergy to your carpet and you find her bouncing off the floor at an alarming pace? Are you going to ask her to wait and just keep bouncing while you downward dog? I don’t think so. For starters it would be very distracting especially cos dogs and cats are not so compatible.

Make it something that will be fun or bring happiness. Is this pretty self-explanatory? Mmmm. No I want some examples. Let’s say “I resolve to build on my friendships and spread the lerv by having lunch or dinner with my friends at least once a week.” See that – do-able and fun and happiness building.

Make it a YES thing not a NO thing. I really hate being told what to do. Even by myself. So if I Resolute to stop something or give something up I feel kind of cranky with myself and deprived and I want what I can’t have even more. Again – another human nature thing. So make it a YES thing instead of a NO thing. That means stuff like “I will eat healthier” rather than “I’m giving up chocolate.” Who would be crazy enough to want to give up chocolate anyway!

So there you go… if you wanted to set some New Year’s Resolutions AND keep them then follow these simple steps. If you made a really cool New Year’s Resolution that you want to share leave it in the comment box below.

Good luck

We’re coming into the new year and a lot of us start thinking about leaving our old job for one that’s more satisfying.

So many people ask me this question: “I’m not happy in my job but what am I meant to be doing?”

I’ve explored this from all angles with people.

“What did you wanna be when you grew up?”

“What are the things you keep coming back to over and over in your life?”

“What section of the bookstore do you always find yourself in?”

And we’ve worked from there.

But today I’ve got a doozy for you that could help you figure out what it is you’re meant to be doing.

1.       Get a big sheet of paper & something to write with.

2.       List the things you can’t do without in your life. For example: spirituality, love, creativity, and being happy. Yep – they’re mine.

You can make your list longer if you like but you wanna condense it down to 3 or 4. You’ll see why in a minute.

3.       Draw 3 or 4 circles (for your condensed ‘can’t live withouts’) and make sure they overlap in the middle.

4.       Write each ‘can’t live without’ in each circle.

Now for the hard bit:

5.       Work out where they intersect.

This step could take some time. So give yourself plenty of thinking space over it. I also recommend discussing it with your friends or family. Or both.

So it goes like this: where do spirituality, love, creativity, and being happy intersect?

Ok –so love also means connection for me, so connecting with people will be an important part of what I do. Creativity makes people happy so I know that doing something creative or doing it creatively will be important too. And if I can make what I’m doing FUN then happiness is sure to follow.

An idea is already forming in my head – positive psychology/coaching would allow me to do all this. AND…. Mindset stuff (which I love) is actually quite spiritual (while also satisfying the geek in me cos there’s lots of scientific evidence for it – you know Quantum Mechanics etc).

So there you go…. a new path mapped out by using the 4 big things I can’t live without.

Give it a go and let me know what you come up with.

Before we start try this little exercise. Try reading out the colours of the words. Not the words themselves. And say them aloud.

Red Blue Green Yellow

Pink Red Orange Blue

Yellow Green Pink Blue

It’s pretty tricky right?

We’re so used to things being a certain way. So used to red being the colour red that our brains have to work double time to untangle us from our expectations. Our expectations are so deeply ingrained that they influence us even when we know that what we’re seeing or experiencing isn’t right.

Scary huh!

So what that means is that sometimes our expectations of life are colouring the reality.

So let’s just say we’ve grown up with a Poverty Mindset. In our world “money is hard to come by” is this version of red. It’s just how it is. We’ve always seen it like that. We know it will keep being like that.  Because red is well…… red. No question about it.

Then let’s say we move away from the influences that tell us that “money is hard to come by” and we start to open up to the possibility that this is red. And this red says that “the universe is abundant and all wealth will flow easily to you”.

It’s a bit confusing. We can see that it could be the same. Sort of. But our perception and expectations make it hard to see it as the same.

We keep looking at it, knowing that this version of red offers so much more. Knowing that we want to believe this version more than the other one. But still finding it a bit uncomfortable and a bit confusing.

This is exactly what it’s like when we’re changing our Mindsets. We look at red and we tell ourselves that this is now true for me. At first it’s hard to believe. Yes we want to believe but deep down we find it a bit hard.

And do you know why? It’s because we’re going against a survival mechanism.

We needed to have certainty and predictability to be able to survive. Sabre Tooth Tigers attack and vegetables grow in the ground. Summers are warm and Winters are cold. We perceived patterns. And we believed that things did what they were supposed to do. Can you imagine if vegetables suddenly attacked? We’d be thrown very off-balance.

So whenever we’re changing anything like Mindsets or a set of beliefs or perceptions we can pretty much be guaranteed it’s going to take time. And effort.

Just try reading those colours again.

Can you imagine how many times you would have to do this for it to become second nature?

So when you’re changing Mindsets make sure you start out with commitment. You will probably find times where you become disheartened. These are the times you commit. And then recommit. And then recommit.

When we’re going up against our ingrained perceptions and beliefs we’re going up against one of the things that kept us safe. That means we could have some internal battles going on. The trick is to be gentle with yourself. No beating yourself up or telling yourself you’ll never have that Abundance Mindset.

Just find another way to practice it. Maybe your brain got bored with saying the same affirmations or practicing the same gratitudes. Mix it up and round out your new belief system. Do everything you can to provide yourself with a content rich, interesting new belief in an abundant world. The more you have to work with, the easier it will be for this to be red.

Oh and one last thing. Keep persevering! It’s worth it.

Let’s face it, for most of us, the idea of ‘more is better’ is better than the idea of ‘less is do-able’. But do you think that’s an Abundance Mindset or a Prosperity Mindset?

I think not.

Hey – don’t get me wrong – I often fall into the ‘more is better’ Mindset. So I’m not preaching as the converted. Well not yet anyway.

But I have noticed that when I come from ‘more is better’ place I do not feel so good. In fact when I’m in the ‘more is better’ Mindset I’m either driven by greed or fear.

And when I’m driven by fear and greed I may as well have a can of Abundance Repellent that I’m spraying all around me.

So what is an Abundance and Prosperity Mindset?

According to Yogi Bhajan (he’s a Kundalini Yoga Master and I’d have to say a Master of Abundance as well):

“A prosperous person has certain characteristics. For that person richness itself is not the basic aim. It happens anyway. A prosperous person does not gather wealth, but the wealth of wealths. No matter what the circumstances, a prosperous person creates, delivers, and fulfils. They act with a constant equilibrium through all pressures and shortcomings. That person will not barter the values of their character or identity for any temporary benefit. They always remember the presence and possibilities of the Infinite within each person. They cultivate endurance, dedication, and awareness. To such a person, prosperity is as natural as the breath, as unlimited as the mind and as immediate as this moment.”

How easy does that sound! Not.

Jeez – No wonder I’m not the converted yet.  Acting with a ‘constant equilibrium’ no matter what is a bit of a challenge. And I have to admit the ‘aim of richness’ has entered my head on more than one occasion. And I’m not so sure I see the best in everyone always, all the time, on every occasion (and that includes me). But I sure am working on it.

So what forms the foundations of an Abundance Mindset or Prosperity Mindset? Here’s a few little tasters:

1.       Give away greed and fear. Being prosperous means you know that your needs will be met. You don’t have to fear going without and you don’t have to hoard or get more, more, more.

2.       Be generous. Prosperity is about a flow of energy. When you’re open hearted and open handed you’ll find that other people are the same to you. All good things come back to you when you’re in the abundance flow.

3.       Feel good about yourself. Self-esteem and self-love attract abundance and prosperity. Happy people are generally wealthier than not so happy people and I reckon that goes for people with good self-worth too. When you value yourself you are more valuable and prosperity will find its way to you.

4.       Be empowered and empowering. Again this creates a flow of energy. Believing in others, sharing their excitement at their achievements, encouraging them – it all helps spread the abundance energy. When you’re not in competition with other people you’re much more open to prosperity.

5.       Release toxic emotions. Hoarding toxic emotions leaves no room for prosperity to enter your world. Clear out the toxic emotional clutter. Stop complaining, bitching and gossiping. Let go of all the old stuff that brings your energy down. And watch as abundance enters your life.

6.       Live in balance. When your intuition, your creativity, your mind, your heart, and your spirit all have a bit of air time then it’s easier for you to recognise when opportunities or abundance are flapping around. When you’re too much in your head or too busy or too caught up in fear or whatever else, you often don’t see that you have all this abundance and prosperity around you. Stop and slow down. You’ll be amazed at what’s already there.